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Thursday, January 7, 2010

Issues of the heart

There were times when i pondered on those times in my life when you weren't there beside me. I would close my eyes and cry myself to sleep. Those were the moments i had to endure in the past without ur presence. Times have changed. Ur with me now. I can never tell how much u actually mean to me. Pleasures of love last a moment but pains of love last a lifetime. I would stand by you through every step you take in life. I would walk with you through the fire of life and through the thorns of heartaches and sufferings. You are a part of me. There is only one happiness in my life. One happiness which can keep me satisfied for a lifetime that is to be loved by you and to love you.

The best and most beautiful things in life can never be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart. I remember the first time i felt that euphoric feeling with you. It was so many years back. And we were an item then. We were like inseparable. And you were the only one who seemed to understand me despite how annoying i used to be. You were always there for me. You never abandoned me for any pleasure of life. You were my rock then.. and now.

What I needed most was to love and to be loved, eager to be caught. Happily I wrapped those painful bonds around me; and sure enough, I would be lashed with the red-hot pokers or jealousy, by suspicions and fear, by burst of anger and quarrels. I remember all those painful nights i went to bed thinking about all those word we used to lash out against each other. I never thought our relationship would survive at one point. But we were still madly in love with each other. And love conquered all, my dear.

Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves. i felt the same way when i was with you. I could walk around even in my most horrible clothes and not comb my hair. But beauty was never the reason you loved me. And that was what drew me closer to you. You loved me despite how horrible i looked or how badly i stank. And i can never repay you for all the care you showered upon me. You took care of me when i were sick. You stayed up all night just to make sure i got back to my room safely. You were everything a girl can ever ask for. And im so lucky that i have you in my life. Because you're mine and mine alone. A gift i can never share with another.

You come to love someone by not finding the perfect person but by finding an imperfect person and looking at them perfectly. Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. You and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.

I love you and that's the only thing that matters to me. Loving you is the enchanted dawn of my heart. Now and forever more.




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